Happy Wednesday Everyone! Today’s newsletter: 1,134 words…4.3 mins

🗞 Today’s Edition: Charlie Hebdo Trolls Ukraine, Team Huddle Before Alaska Summit, Frankenstein Rabbits, AOL Pulls The Plug, Kennedy Center Honorees, Greta’s Gaza Trip, … & much more!

🚨 Watch For:

One killer insight to stash in your back pocket

☎ Zelensky, Europe and Trump: Prepping for Putin in Alaska

Today’s virtual call set the stage for Friday’s Trump–Putin summit in Alaska. Trump, Zelensky, and Europe’s heavyweights (Merz, Macron, Starmer) tried to box Putin in with three hard lines:

Meeting Got a Yelp-Style Rating:

Trump called it “exceptionally constructive” , rated this meeting “a 10”.

🤔 The plot twist: He promised Ukraine gets the final say on territory, but also hinted at "some swapping" long-term. Europe's reaction: nervous European noises.

Zelensky, blunt as ever:

The backstop: If Moscow stonewalls, expect new sanctions + ramped-up weapons to Ukraine.

💡 Bottom line: Trump's walking into Alaska with Europe's red lines memorized, but Putin's about to test whether American dealmaking trumps European solidarity. Friday's summit isn't just diplomacy—it's a masterclass in whether the "Art of the Deal" works when your opponent lives and breathes "The Art of War."

Geopolitics Decoded In 3 Moves

🔥 Charlie Hebdo's Alaska Roast Draws Outrage

Charlie Hebdo dropped today's cover: "Trump and Putin: Nobel Prize for Barbecue" showing the duo manning a grill with Zelensky as the main course ahead of Friday's Alaska summit.

The cartoon—mocking Alaska summit fears of a Ukraine carve-up—drew Kremlin’s applause and Kyiv’s ire.

💡 Bottom line: When French satirists are roasting your geopolitical survival chances, you know the Alaska summit's stakes just got very, very real.

⛵ Greta’s Gaza Do-Over: Because Failure Is Just A Warm-Up Act

The world's most irritating activist is back! Fresh off her humiliating June flotilla flop (where Israeli commandos turned her protest into a viral meme-fest), Greta Thunberg has assembled another ragtag armada of virtue-signaling boats to “break Israel’s illegal blockade”.

…This time with extra cringe:

Israel’s Navy swatted down two earlier voyages, boarding and deporting the activists as they cried for help (literally) upon seeing a drone overhead.

💡 Bottom line: This isn't humanitarian aid – it's performance art for the terminally online, where the only thing getting broken is Greta's dignity... again.

🇲🇽 🇺🇸 Mexico’s Cartel Airlift to the U.S.

In a high-stakes handoff (and a quid pro quo), Mexico just airmailed 26 cartel bosses to the U.S., including “Los Cuinis” kingpin Abigael González Valencia and Roberto Salazar, tied to the 2008 murder of an LA sheriff’s deputy.

Bottom line: Trump’s pressure campaign is turning extraditions into an express service for America’s most wanted.

⚡ Watch for: Trump admin’s social media team to whip up some Breaking Bad-style posts in the coming days.

Political Drama From DC To NYC

🐰 Frankenstein Rabbits

Colorado officials are warning residents after sightings of grotesque “Frankenstein” rabbits—infected with cottontail papilloma virus—showing black, tentacle-like growths sprouting from their heads.

Wildlife experts urge: don’t touch, don’t help. These real-life jackalopes are a grim reminder that nature sometimes out-weirds the myths.

💡 Bottom line: Nature’s trolling us—hard

🏅 🎭 Trump Names Kennedy Center Honorees

President Trump unveiled this year’s Kennedy Center Honors lineup:

Trump praised each honoree with personal anecdotes, from seeing Rambo on release to calling Gaynor’s “I Will Survive” timeless. He also joked that next year he might add himself to the list, quipping, “I’ll give myself an honor.”

💡 Why it matters: Since 1978, the Kennedy Center Honors have been some of the most prestigious and coveted awards in the country. They will be broadcast in December on CBS.

Tech Wars, Crypto Chaos, and AI’s Black Mirror Moments

💾AOL to Pull the Plug on Dial-Up, Ending a 90s Internet Era

AOL will shut down its iconic dial-up service on Sept. 30, 2025, closing a chapter that brought millions online in the 1990s with its screeching modems and “You’ve Got Mail!” greetings.

The move won’t affect other AOL services but marks a symbolic farewell to the creaky door that opened the internet age.

🛒 Amazon Expands Same-Day Grocery Delivery to 1,000 Cities

Amazon now offers same-day delivery of perishable groceries in 1,000 U.S. cities, aiming to outpace Instacart and Walmart+ in quick-commerce.

Prime members get free delivery over $25, while non-members pay $12.99. Amazon plans to reach 2,300 cities by year’s end.

5 Famous Buildings That Have Their Own ZIP Codes!

The biggest buildings in the country and ones receiving the most mail, get their own ZIP codes. Here are some of the most famous ones:

The Empire State Building (New York, NY)

The White House (Washington D.C.)

General Electric Plant (Schenectady, NY)

Dodger Stadium (Los Angeles, CA)

Walmart Headquarters (Bentonville, AR)

Bonus #1: New York City has 43 buildings with their own ZIP codes

Bonus #2: The entire shoe floor in Saks Fifth Avenue has its own ZIP code

Because World Leaders Beg To Be Dragged